​I am a cradle Catholic. My mom and dad provided a good foundation to me when I was growing up. I used to serve as an altar boy. Then I went to college and misbehaved there a bit and strayed from my faith, though I still went to church. But I always had a heart for the poor – those who had no voice. I tried to be their voice, having grown up in a poor, humble family myself. I was involved with Northern Colorado’s immigrant farm workers and became very angry with the establishment and the world, seeing their cycle of poverty. I tried to help those poor people and taught their kids English and other practical skills. After that opportunity ran out, I had nothing else to do, so I started to drink and party without much purpose in life. The people I hung out with had bad habits and those habits soon became mine too... 

I worked though and tried to be a responsible employee, along with my brother who worked for the same company. We used to go out after work. One day, we drove separate cars after getting two or three bears each. He got pulled over. I was worried about him and kept going around a block, checking on him. Of course, I was soon pulled over too. They took both of us to a nearby hospital for a blood test. We got DUI tickets and driving class time, but didn’t have to go to jail. Still, my life went down the hill from there because of the consequences of my DUI and the associated shame. I was in poor shape.

Deacon Chuck knew about my struggle and made me an offer: “I’ll give you a money back guarantee. There will be a Catholic Charismatic conference in Albuquerque, NM, go check it out. If you don’t like it, I’ll give you your money back.” I never heard of anything Catholic Charismatic until then.  And I don’t know what hit me, I took Chuck up on it.  That was about 25 years ago. At the conference, there were three or four thousand people praising God.  I was drawn in. Their music, preaching, praying in tongues, and Mass captivated me. It was really something - I’d never seen Catholics doing THIS before!  But now I know that our Pope supports Catholic Charismatic Renewal. God healed my anger at that conference and I became very hungry for God and His Word. During breaks, I went to their book sale and wanted to buy every book there.  They also had the Baptism in the Spirit, so I went with all the newbies to receive it. The guy next to me went down to rest in the Spirit. I wanted to get a doctor right away!  But I was told not to worry because this was OK. As for my experience when I was prayed over, the Holy Spirit came alive for me, though I must admit that I focused on digging my toes and heels into my shoes to stay upright. I know that it’s not a sign of weakness to rest in the Spirit – people who do obviously experience so much peace!    

Mass came alive for me afterwards, I was no longer just going through the motions of Catholic aerobics. Especially the Eucharist became very personal for me. I remember getting carried away at the first Mass after my first conference – when they said “peace be with you”, I’ve grabbed the lady next to me and gave her a hug. Oh, but she didn’t recognize where I was coming from!

You know, in my pew at church, I used to just expect to be fed and was never into stepping out and feeding others. But God has ways of moving me. He gave me courage. Now I am starting to venture out at my church of St. Dominic. I joined a book club and other small groups and am hoping to bring a Life in the Spirit Seminar to that church soon.
The praise and worship at the church of the Holy Apostles energizes me for the rest of the week, especially when the world beats me up.  After the praise and worship, I can go back and fight a good fight again. People here became like my family, like my brothers and sisters.

My prayer life has changed dramatically too. I like to practice Lectio Divina when I read the Holy Scripture every morning. The Holy Spirit makes the scriptures come alive for me, He teaches me about their meaning. I become free when I pray, it’s like a conversation with God, well beyond the limits of formalized prayers like Our Father and Hail Mary that I learned in my childhood. I also like to go to Perpetual Adoration at 3:0 A.M.  

I still get angry at times when I get stuck in traffic, or just because the world is a mess. But I don’t hold onto my anger anymore. Instead, I pray, asking the Lord to free me from it. I no longer give angry gestures but pray for people who cut me off in traffic. I have matured and progressed in the way I handle this now.  My life just keeps growing with the Lord and I’ll probably keep at it until I grow old and die.  
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So, I did not ask Chuck for my money back. My life has changed radically for the better and I am grateful for it.

Author: Deacon Chuck Matzker ​

​During the Liturgical Year between Easter and Pentecost, we read the Acts of the Apostles as a reading in the Mass.  As we prepare for Pentecost, one cannot go through this book of Acts without coming face to face with the fact that praying in tongues was a reality in the early church.   
 
The questions that can arise from these texts are – what about now? – is this a valid gift of prayer for TODAY?  If so, what is its purpose? Is it Catholic? Why would I want it?
 
My intent here is to try to briefly answer some of these questions, and in so doing, to bring us to a deeper appreciation of the marvelous ways of God, who confounds the wisdom of the wise and asks us to become like little children in accepting the Kingdom. I will use a simple question and answer format...

Q. Is Praying in Tongues real and valid?

A. Without a doubt – YES! It is scriptural (See Acts of the Apostles and 1 Corinthians 12-14 as a start).  It is the lived experience of the Christian Church today. It is experienced by millions of Catholics and Christians of other denominations in this parish, diocese, city, country and around the world.  Many priests and Bishops pray in tongues.  I also have this gift, and use it daily. The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches that the gift of tongues is one of the special graces or “charisms” of the Holy Spirit: “Whatever their character - sometimes it is extraordinary, such as the gift of miracles or of tongues - charisms are oriented toward sanctifying grace and are intended for the common good of the Church.” (CCC paragraph 2003) Showing his support for Catholic Charismatic Renewal, Pope Francis in May 2014 knelt down in front of nearly 52,000 charismatic Catholics in Rome’s Olympic Stadium as they prayed for him in tongues.
 
Q. What is it? Is it forced out of you by the Holy Spirit? Is it under your control?

A. It is totally under the person’s control. When we pray in tongues, we leave our known language behind – and begin to praise and pray to God in sounds (syllables) that have no rational meaning. We cooperate with the Spirit by providing our lips and vocal cords, by making some sound, and then allowing the Spirit to form the rest of the sounds (articulations). It may sound to some like a foreign language, but it is an articulation of the heart, a “babbling” like a baby, so to speak, like the bubbling of “living water.”   In tongues we yield our mind and voice to God, in humility.
 
Q. Why would anybody want to pray this way?

• Because it is a gift of God – and therefore God has a reason for it. He does not make mistakes.
• It enables us to pray freely, praying the will of God in the situation, not our own will. It is great for intercessory prayer.
• It increases humility within us – as we yield our intellect and voice to God.
• It helps us praise God for extended periods – we don’t have to think of the words – we just do it!
• It opens us up to hearing the inspirations of the Spirit more clearly, and in using the gifts of the Spirit in power.

 
Q. Where can I find out more about this gift?

A. See the excellent write-up at the Archdiocese of San Antonio website: http://cccrsa.net/charismaticcenter/what-is-the-gift-of-tongues/

The National Service Committee (NSC) of the Charismatic Renewal offers a pamphlet on the topic. See https://www.comcenter.com/product/NSCC-GOT/The-Gift-Charism-of-Tongues/

Also, come to the Wednesday night Praise Gathering at Holy Apostles Church, and check out the resources.   

Author: Doug K.

​I attended the Life in the Spirit Seminar in the year of 2,000.  I joke with people, telling them that it was my midlife crisis. The Seminar was talked about in Mass and I’ve heard a little voice inside me telling me that I should really consider it. It was going to be over seven evenings, but I was working evening shifts at that time.  Surprisingly, that obstacle was moved away - my boss allowed me to take off for the seminars and come back to finish the job afterwards.

​I don’t drive a car due to my poor eyesight, but my mom agreed to give me a lift. Unfortunately, she forgot that she was supposed to pick me up at work and take me to the seminar.  It was very unusual for her to forget like that. Something else strange happened the second week of the seminar and I was late again.  I thought – somebody doesn’t want me to be here. This must be important because there is this opposition. So I made up my mind to not be late anymore. I still remember how the two people who invited me to the seminar were there at the registration desk. I told them I must look like a lamb being lead to a slaughter. They just laughed, knowing that the Lord had great things in store for me...  

​The evening of the baptism of the Holy Spirit came. I have never had people praying over me until then.  They told me that my life was going to be different. I was hoping that I would jump for joy, laugh, speak in tongues, kind of doing a bit of everything.  I don’t remember the specific prayers I received, but what I remember the most are the words “Jesus is here.”  I SO wanted to feel some incredible sensation, but I didn’t. I walked home in the dark feeling very unhappy.  But I came back the next week, though it was hard, and my life did start to change.

For example, Mass changed for me completely.  I don’t know what I’ve been doing for the first 30-35 years of my life.  I always went to Mass, including my college years. I tried to be active in each of the parishes that I was in.  But after my Baptism in the Holy Spirit, holy Scriptures were starting to come alive for me. I started to actually hear the Mass readings and even understand the connections between them. Everything in the Mass started to fit together – it made sense. I was listening to homilies, sitting on every word, trying to understand what the point was, and walking out of Mass chewing on things I heard and experienced.  That has never happened before. I became eager to read the Lamb’s Supper by Scott Hahn and other spiritual literature. One of the biggest changes was how I started relating to God and what he was doing – all of that tied into the bigger picture. I never worried about any of those things before. But they began to matter to me. After a few years like this, I volunteered to help teach Confirmation classes and sponsored 3 or 4 people in RCIA. Their classes met on Sunday afternoons – even during football season. But I didn’t care, I was happy to be there with those people. It was very exciting to see them being baptized and confirmed. I don’t know that I would have done any of this before the year 2000.
 
My singing has changed as well. I like to sing more than anything else in this world. At Mass, I was able to offer my singing to God. At times I have a privilege of canting. I always ask the Holy Spirit to make it sound the way he wants. I’ve learned that the gifts that were given to me were not just so that I could be really good at something, but they were meant to be passed on to people. Awareness of that has changed my singing a great deal.

Another new thing for me was that I became very interested in learning more about the Church. I started reading about church history and saints, such as St. Augustine. I found it very captivating. There were always outstanding saints and popes, even in the dark periods.

Being able to praise God fills me with joy.  We all know that a prayer of praise is just a type of prayer.  But it was new to really understand what that meant and to meet other Christians and be comfortable with talking to them – not just about the Church, but about Christ and our relationship with Him, our walk with Him. When they had questions, I became comfortable with sharing answers. For example, my boss is from the LDS church. We enjoy talking about faith together.  He was wondering about what is one place in the Catholic Church that’s important, like Mecca to Muslims. It was a good question that intrigued me. And I said that a really holy place is where each tabernacle stands, with a Eucharist in it. It doesn’t matter how important the place of the church is.  They are all holy places because of the Eucharist. I know I didn’t think of that by myself. And I know it was a great answer. Thank you God! I am now working on a job change and want God to really be in the decision.
 
I think I received a gift of praying in tongues. I did a gift survey based on the Catherine of Siena Institute’s guideline, and, besides the gift of music, I also have the gift of encouragement. When I see or hear people being unsure of themselves while doing something and they obviously have the skill to do that job, I try to encourage them. I also marvel at the people in the Praise and Worship community here and the gifts they have.

It seems that the older I get, the less I know. And my body poses many obstacles for me - I don’t see very well and so can’t really drive and I don’t recognize people, which gets me into embarrassing situations.  But I love the Scripture that says “my ways are not your ways, and my thoughts are not your thoughts” - it lets us off the hook.  We don’t have to worry about how and why everyone and everything is put together. We just need to know that God is in charge of it. He created it and made it the way he wants it to be. And we need to be the best part of His creation that we can be.
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So, now I see that the changes after the year 2000 happened in stages – some of them fast, some of them slowly. The people who prayed for me back then were right.  My life did change.  The way I view pretty much everything has changed. I’ve got so much to be thankful for!

Author: Ruth C.

​I was raised a Protestant – charismatic non-denominational. My parents were among the founding members of the New Life Church. But, over the years, I went in and out of churches, trying different denominations.  But something was always missing. I was thinking –just give me Jesus. I don’t need all the other fluff. I knew that my relationship with Him did not depend on how big is the meeting, how expensive is the equipment, or how many flashing lights you have. 
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Unlike at New Life, I found the simplicity of the manifestation of the Holy Spirit in power at the Catholic Church. The Holy Spirit is present when He is invited and not put in a box.  That’s when our encounter becomes miraculous.  That’s when hearts change…

I was mentored and loved by the praise and worship group at the Church of Holy Apostles for 7 years. They walked the journey with me, helping me sort out the closet. We all have a spiritual closet where we store the good, the bad, and the ugly.  My closet had a lot of ugly, but I did not want to talk about it or even look at it for years.  But, eventually, stuff is going to fall out of a closet.  For me, when it started to fall out, I became worried.  But instead of running away from it, my new Catholic friends walked with me, loved me, and prayed with me.  It became very clear that Jesus is here. His love is here.

I didn’t use to feel safe enough to be truly myself. I had to put on a smile and act like everything was OK, even when it wasn’t OK.  I used to feel like a broken, failed Christian, not knowing what my identity was. But I was truly touched by the prophetic Word of God proclaimed by the Catholic Charismatic community, like that about the River of God flowing from the Throne of God into the city and out, based on the book of Revelation. That river delivers healing to the nations, and even flows right here, providing safety. God’s river is the safe place for us to be cleansed, healed, and made whole. Wow. It touched me deeply to hear that I was safe in God’s house. I never forget just sitting there in front of the church afterwards, sobbing and sobbing.  But, only when you let down your guard, the healing can happen. God is not going to act unless you allow him to do so.

Before the change in the heart begins to take shape, Jesus must be glorified - in the simplicity of the message of the cross, with gratefulness for what Jesus has done for each and every person. Jesus loves and has a plan for everyone. And it doesn’t matter if you feel like you may fail in your walk with Him. Failure is the biggest lie that the enemy can use against us “oh, you failed again, you aren’t good enough, go away. You’ve got to be perfect to be used for the purposes of Jesus!” That’s the biggest lie ever. We can repent and turn back to Love Himself.

In this Catholic Charismatic community, you’ve got young people and seniors, new people mixed with people who are seasoned in the Spirit. The group is so open. It has welcomed my questions. “Let’s discern it with you and find out,” they’d say.  And so we’d pray together, leap together, cry together. Step by step, this Praise and Worship group has turned me into a Catholic convert.

When I was finally ready to go through the RCIA process, I had an entire community with me in the congregation; loving me, backing me, praying for me, affirming my Catholic faith. It was amazing.  I was overwhelmed with understanding of the meaning of the Family of God. This is what the Lord intended it to be like!  I even came to love the smells and the bells in this Church.  There is always sweetness in the sanctuary. When we kneel and bow to the presence of Christ in the Eucharist, I truly love perceiving the Lord coming here, to me and so many others - we are meeting God literally in the Eucharist. How amazing is THAT! And how on earth did I make it for 28 years of knowing who He was, but never partaking of his Body and Blood! It always baffles me how Jesus brought me here so I could be closer to Him.

I never before knew the power of the bread and wine as the body and blood of Christ. I just thought that Catholics were kind of weird, and I didn’t think they really get it. But when I came in here, it was literally like the Spirit of God slapped me in the face the way only He can – “I’ve proved you wrong, Ruth. I am dwelling here, and you found me here.”

It’s not that the Spirit of God is not welcome in other churches, but it seemed like there had to be a certain set of criteria – the preaching and music had to be right on, and everything had to be perfect. But when you find the power of the Holy Spirit within the sacraments that Jesus himself instituted, you become unstoppable!  When I receive communion, I am filled with love and courage – “yes, I can do this!” 

I’m not saying that everything is easy now. And, indeed, I am at times called by the Holy Spirit to obedience but respond with resentment at first, thinking “there is no way you are calling me to do this now…”  But I no longer avoid the these situations nor turn the other way. When you have this loving community around you, things change and following Jesus becomes easier.  Here, you are encouraged to grow and to step outside yourself into something that’s so much better. 

Author: Eric S.

​My story is about the power of praise and worship.  Before I started with our Charismatic community, I was a bit apprehensive about it. Now I am pretty comfortable, and I even joined a worship music band.   
 
I have joined this community through Life in the Spirit Seminar - people from my parish invited me to come.  At the seminar, I met the prayer group and was baptized in Spirit.  At first, I didn’t feel very different, but things slowly started to change.  When people shared the Word of God at the Praise and Worship meetings, I could understand it.  It resonated with me, I received it in my heart and grew spiritually. I responded back to the Word because it spoke to me personally.  I felt more alive, especially while playing worship music with our band. I came to love the worship songs - when I’d sing them, I’d really mean them. God was reworking me, putting me through paces I didn’t expect...​

I used to be afraid to share what I’ve perceived in Spirit. But I was encouraged by others in our community, gradually overcame my bashfulness, and decided that I would not hold back. At first, I wasn’t sure if I was meant to speak out. But then I tried bit by bit– when the Spirit prompted me, I started speaking out, sharing what I’ve received with others. And they’ve affirmed me.

You know, this is not easy for me as I suffer from schizophrenia. Just recently, I’ve gone through an episode and lost my way. I feel like I’ve lost a great deal of the spiritual connection because of that episode. But it is now coming back with Praise and Worship and the kindness of the community.
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If you’d ask me what’s next for me, I’d say that I’m not worried about it.  I am grateful for what God has already given me in this community that became like a family to me. What a community that is!  Its praise and worship of God became my lifeline. 

My journey with God was ignited by the experience I had at the World Youth Day in Denver, in August of 1993. I was one of about 96,000 people at the Mile High Stadium.   We were gathered waiting for the Pope St. John Paul the Great to arrive.  Helicopters flew near the stadium – the first two did not land, but the third helicopter finally did land and on the jumbo screen we saw a cardinal getting off.  We knew that John Paul II had arrived too.  He went into the tunnel with the cardinal and some other dignitaries and, a few minutes later, they’ve appeared inside the stadium in the Pope mobile. As the Pope mobile began to drive around the inside of the stadium, you could hear the 96,000 people gathered sing out “John Paul II, we love you, John Paul II, we love you!”  It reverberated throughout the stadium. The place was electrified.

​I was in my early thirties and had a powerful experience as John Paul II came by. All of a sudden, I was sobbing. I wasn’t sad and didn’t know what came over me, but all these tears were just pouring out of my eyes. I felt an immense warmth and joy as I was overcome with emotion.  It was healing.  And it was puzzling. I was trying to figure out what I was experiencing... 

Later in the evening, I talked with some of the members of our group who have driven up from Pueblo about the book of Acts where St. Peter would walk and wherever his shadow was cast, or where someone would touch his garment just like people had done with Jesus, people would be healed and brought into the faith and into the Church.  And I realized that the shadow of John Paul II had been cast across the stadium. Through that, I received a spiritual gift of grace into my heart and into my soul. I remember it like it was yesterday.  

It created a much bigger love and appreciation for the pope in me – for the office of Peter – than I had up until that time. I had a burning desire to attend the next World Youth Day about 18 months later. In fact, I met my future wife a bit later and we went to Philippines for the World Youth Day together. About 150 people of Colorado went too, along with the 3 bishops. There, at a Carmelite Monastery, we’ve picked our wedding day – the feast of the Holy Rosary.

I think that God has used my experience to open the door for me to meet my wife. And that was not the only door. I also became very active in the Knights of Columbus and in the pro-life ministry. I became involved in the Catholic Charismatic renewal movement and started going to adoration and praise and worship meetings. So many beautiful things began to happen!  
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I didn’t see any of it coming before my Denver encounter. I used to just go to Mass with my grandparents and my uncle and was in a youth group at the Holy Family parish in Pueblo, where I was just starting to do a bit of work with the Knights of Columbus. But the Holy Spirit ignited a great fire in me and a desire for much more. He seized me and used the Holy Father to cast His fire upon me. ​

Author: Barbara Matzker
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The LORD is my strength and song, and He has become my salvation; This is my God, and I will praise Him…Exodus 15:2
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The Psalms are filled with beautiful praises to God…praises that have become part of my daily prayer and walk.  How did this happen to a mother of three rambunctious young boys to whom every Mass felt like either a war zone or a test of perseverance?  It happened one day in a totally unexpected place and manner. Pope Francis recently said "I invite all Christians, everywhere, at this very moment, to a renewed personal encounter with Jesus Christ, or at least an openness to letting Him encounter them…”

Several years ago, long before Pope Francis’ invitation, I was sitting on a floor of a home listening to a young man talk about Jesus in his life.  His sharing brought me to say my first spontaneous prayer…”I am not totally sure of what he is talking about, but Lord, I do want what he is describing.”  I didn’t even know I was seeking more of God…because I really didn’t know there was more beyond my great Catholic upbringing and all the prayers I had learned from my parents, Catholic schools and CCD.  But that night, Jesus Christ did encounter me and poured out His love in such a way that everything in my life changed, and praise became a part of my everyday life, through good times and difficult times.  Many other things changed as well, but the praise and joy were what overwhelmed me and continue to do so.   

And this is what each ‘Life in the Spirit Seminar’ offers to each of us!  An opportunity to say to God, “Thank you for all you have done for me!  If there is more, please grace me with that more.  Let me encounter you, Jesus.”  Through challenging talks, small sharing groups, and prayerful reflections we can each open ourselves to the Grace of God and release of His gifts that were given to us in Baptism and Confirmation.  The Gift of the Holy Spirit changes lives!  We host ‘Life in the Spirit Seminars’ annually and hope that you can join us!